by Nicole Ballinger

Having Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day declared across Australia came one step closer to reality this week. My husband and I were the guests of our MP, Mrs Joanna Gash, to witness this historic debate.

But actually, there was no debate to be had.

Just as in the State (NSW) Parliament last Oct. (read more), this week there was uncontested and passionate support from both the majority government and its opposition re the official recognition of October 15th as Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day. 

One MP after the next expressed that losing a baby either to miscarriage, stillbirth or perinatal causes is commonly experienced, yet bereaved parents tend to grieve in silence and alone.

Tears were shared, and members of both sides hugged and empathised with one MP in particular -- whose grief was triggered, 26 years after his premature baby’s death. All in all, it was a very touching and moving 20 minutes of history, to say the least.

For now, the matter has been adjourned. But with such uncontested support we at PILARI are confident that this day will be officially declared in the near future. Together with our MPs, we will continue to ‘fight the good fight’ until this day is declared. And we thank you, our readers, for your ongoing support.

Highlights from this week's Hansard:

“In terms of the impact of the event [pregnancy and infant loss], you need to factor in fathers, grandparents, aunts, uncles, and even friends and workplace colleagues. For all intents and purposes, this is post-traumatic stress disorder… This proposal for a pregnancy and infant loss remembrance day is not just a sentimental gesture; there are clinical and therapeutic benefits to be had” – Joanna Gash MP (Member for Gilmore; Liberal Party)


“Men feel it deeply as well… it is something that a lot of people experience. In many cases they remain silent about it, but it is very useful for people to be able to share their experiences with each other and to know that you are not alone in your grief, and that it continues for much longer than you think” – Sid Sidebottom MP (Member for Braddon; Australian Labor Party)

“There was no encouragement of photos, flowers, a service for the naming of the child. No doubt that led to more grief and a wondering if the mother and father – and perhaps the brothers, sisters and grandparents – were the only ones who really cared … We have got to make sure that we do all we can to support families … in those circumstances. There is no doubt that grieving together, identifying your loss and having the community understand your loss must help in the grieving process” --  Dr Sharman Stone (Member for Murray; Liberal Party)

“Last year I watched one of my best friends carry a small white coffin in his arms… his daughter had died in utero…. My friends recently wrote to me: ‘Every phone call, every message, or simple gesture recognising our daughter as part of new lives helps us move forward in our grief. Last year, we participated in our first International Pregnancy and Infant Loss Day and Walk to Remember. Friends, family and the greater community all coming together to remember and honour the far too many babies’ lives lost. IPIL Day enabled us to feel the love and support of our wider community again’.” -- Mr. David Bradbury (Member for Lindsay, Australian Labor Party)

To see the entire parliamentary Hansard  -- 4 quick speeches and a real page-turner -- Click here